Reblogged from Reasonably Ludicrous:

A handy list of Do’s an Don’t's! DO Wander around your apartment in your underwear. Or, if you’re feeling ‘ballsy,’ completely naked! Your girlfriend was the one who always wanted you to “put some clothes on, for god’s sake.” You thought that was counterproductive–she was just going to take them off anyway! Well now’s your chance to feel those hard-to-reach spots get caressed by the winds of freedom rather than by someone who demands you come to every single one of her interpretive dance …

Read it a day too late! Gotta agree with the “stay in” point! You could include “Don’t log onto Facebook today” because all the love shared on walls and statuses between your coupled friends and their lovers will make you want to pour bleach in your eyes!

In a dire perplexing moment, I took to the internet to research. For about a decade+1/2, my inner voice has spoken to me in American. Which is just as bizarre considering I was born-raised in India and although the medium of study from age 3 something was English, I don’t sound as Indian as I should. Picking up accents happens on an unconscious level, not sure why my unconscious was so reluctant to pick up the one closer to my mother tongue.

In comparison to the kids and teachers around me, my speech was always on the fast track. I was too restless, too impatient, just plain weird to enunciate the way my teachers expected me to. The year I turned 7 was the one when American TV shows started flooding India and I was introduced to this awesome foreign accent! I fit the perfect American teen stereotype of mid-late 90s, I was overweight, ate junk all day and had a ‘virtual’ wedding with Nick Carter without his consent or even knowledge!

Up until 2007, I believed I sounded American because I rolled my R’s and stressed my jaw pronouncing O’s. Then I landed in Britain and I was asked if I was Canadian…over and over…even by a random little 5 year old. What the —-! My Indian+ American twang = me pronouncing ‘out’ like Robin from How I Met Your Mother.

Now, my vocal accent goes by as Canadian. On many occasions, I have spun stories about being from Canada for over inquisitive taxi drivers. #cheapthrills

All this considered, its only apt that my inner voice speaks to me with an American accent. Sure, there are occasions when my imagination runs off to Vegas and gets high. At those moments, my inner self converses with me in a variety of accents, from ghetto chick to a flamboyant fashion designer named Raul to some random character from the South.

But lately, all the looney toons have left town and my inner voice is stuck on an up-tight British accent. May be I picked up just enough British vocab to boost my inner voice’s confidence and pass by as a Brit without being judged by the other hidden accents inside my head! Oh… the mind’s eccentricities.

Traveling abroad, people go through all kinds of transformations, who knew the inner voice undergoes one too?!

You’ll notice there is a red light emitting from the headphone slot. Either put your headphones back in again and try removing them gently. This used to do the trick for me until today. BTW, Restarting will NOT solve your problem!

When nothing worked, a little Google search taught me the toothpick trick. Facing forward, looking at the headphone slot, you’ll notice a button like thingy at 3 o’clock. Not 9 but 3 o’clock. A thing to note is that there are two button like thingies when you look inside. Forget the first one, try reaching the one closer to the light (deeper inside).

Don’t use anything made from METAL! It will cause a short circuit and if your Mac is from 2008 and out of warranty like mine, thats a BAD idea.

Use a wooden toothpick to push this 3 o’clock button on the inside. If you turn the toothpick in a clockwise fashion, you’ll notice the red light stops emitting when you press against this button thingy. Keep turning/pushing until the red light stops emitting. The grayed button will turn black again. Viola! Your audio is back on.

Quotes, Poetry, Stories…I couldn’t re-quote to save my life.

Now, add some music to those and I might just remember them for life.

The most memorable songs are the ones that can mess with your imagination like a hallucinogenic psilocybe mushroom, exploit your emotions and drag your mind to that “once upon a time” memory in the story of your life. A good artist knows how to unlock the emotions in their audience and instigate body responses. I reckon, the most popular body responses must be body movements and plain old weeping.

My Google research tells me that even though there are plenty views on the subject matter, it is still unclear why music has such a hold over our emotions. It just does and like spirituality, gut instincts, co-incidences…I shall not question it.

Dramatic verbal expression has me written all over it. People with vivid imagination tend to appreciate expression that evokes passionate feelings. If I was born with the talent to paint or make music, it would be pretty flamboyant. All I have are words and a lifetime of lessons to learn to get better at my passion.

A wide array of writers inspire me but the ones who jump the queue to enter my heart are musicians. I can’t act pretentious and say I find a random Mr. Indie musician inspirational! I enjoy popular music and although I give “absolutely everything” a listen, I’m still a sucker for mainstream music.

Ryan Tedder is one of my favourite song writers. Whatever this guy pens, ends up being something the angels would want to sing.

Gary Lightbody is my other inspiration, clearly so as I’ve dedicated this blog post to him. My inner self resonates with every emotion this guy writes about. “Run” has always been that one song which takes me back to the most beautiful moments of my life, all alone on the street, running behind the Headingley Stadium on cold wet winter nights. The thought of walking down an empty street at night creeps me but this run was always so special. I’d have this song on loop and just keep going. Sounds bonkers to run to an emotional song rather than something upbeat but it always helped me clear my head and focus on connecting with my emotions, forgetting the usual nonsense logic. Vivid imagination takes over me and if I’m in a public place, I’ve to hold back my tears! Never before has any song evoked such powerful emotional response in me.

A little while ago, more like 6 years, Snow Patrol recorded Set the fire to the third bar. I never had a chance to listen to this one until today and before I knew it, this one has me weeping. Moments like these, I’m glad to be a girl. This one hits home and I absolutely love the lyrics.

I find the map and draw a straight line
Over rivers, farms, and state lines
The distance from ‘A’ to where you’d be
It’s only finger-lengths that I see
I touch the place where I’d find your face
My fingers in creases of distant dark places

I hang my coat up in the first bar
There is no peace that I’ve found so far
The laughter penetrates my silence
As drunken men find flaws in science

Their words mostly noises
Ghosts with just voices
Your words in my memory
Are like music to me

I’m miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold ground
I, I pray that something picks me up
And sets me down in your warm arms

After I have travelled so far
We’d set the fire to the third bar
We’d share each other like an island
Until exhausted, close our eyelids
And dreaming, pick up from
The last place we left off
Your soft skin is weeping
A joy you can’t keep in

I’m miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold ground
And I, I pray that something picks me up
and sets me down in your warm arms

I’m miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold ground
and I, I pray that something picks me up
and sets me down in your warm arms

In other stuff, their new song ‘In the End‘ (yet another one with lyrics that makes my heart go puffy) has a remix I want to do somersaults to, the original song will be released on 13th February, 2012.

No, I don’t really run my mouth like a bull dozer and I DON’T have tourettes! I am a passionate conversation nerd which means, I enjoy talking to weird/sweet people but what I love even more, is listening to their stories. As long as someone can handle my brutal truth without getting a bag full of emotions involved (and usually folks with the weird/sweet combination can handle me) we’ll sail smooth but the moment some other combination encounters me, they are left speechless and unknowingly hurt. At that point, my journey of living a lifetime in error resumes.

A fancy term to describe my condition is “Radical Honesty“. If the stone is black, I will call it black unless it is my professional self that wants to market a service (then I’ll even call it neon) but thats another story. To me, the thought of lying-glossification of stories-conveniently forgetting key information has always been alien. Instinctually, I am honest to the no-return point of stupid. If I find money, I’m more likely to ask someone if they dropped it than keep it. Although ridiculously repetitive life lessons have forced me to act otherwise. The last time I found some ‘little’ money lying around, I ended up giving it to the dog charity and spent rest on buying my friend a coffee.

But, my honesty doesn’t always paint the picture of an altruistic, free-thinker whose heart bleeds little butterflies and rainbows for the hard ruthless world. Honesty when finds itself transcending into the verbal world of the Loominator, it takes the shape of a samurai’s Katana. I’m quicker at naming that elephant in the room than a Google instant search on baby names. What is the point of beating around the bush? Only wastes time and life is too short for that. The problem occurs when you realize, the world still expects cushioning and considers every honest statement, a blow to their ego/power/self. Even worse, people enjoy mind-games. If you want to kill me, play mind games with me. It drives me super insane. Not sure how but a lifetime living with this error has usually left me with shocked family, bouts of passive aggression from friends and speechless men.

What is so wrong about radical honesty? If anything, it should make relationships stronger and last longer. After all, it is direct communication. When I do something wrong or annoying, I want to be told just how frustrating my actions are, why should I be left to ‘hopefully someday‘ figure issues that my shadow self suffers from, when you on the other end know exactly what is wrong with me! I reckon, the first rule of practicing radical honesty is to be willing to handle it yourself.

I’ve had a lifetime of practice, plenty moments filled with bizarre/inappropriate self expression through words but over the years, situations and experiences have made me shy away or tone it down, sometimes to the point where I just won’t say anything at all. As everything else in life, this aspect of my personality is a struggle.

After years of back and forth on whether speaking the truth is right or wrong, I’ve concluded that there ought to be a scale or a matrix of radical honesty based on importance of the other person in your life. Sure, I occasionally stop making sense when my thoughts start scattering inside my head and my mind works faster than my tongue can keep up with but somewhere along the line, I’ve learnt to shut up and not be so damn impulsive. Sometimes, situations are just not worth it. Radical honesty is an art which when practiced wrong or over-done, can get you in serious trouble. Why waste your breath?

I wouldn’t worry about the future

I wouldn’t over think the past

In that moment, I’d be alive.

A while ago I read something about Anticipating Regret on PsyBlog. We don’t just worry about future happenings, we worry about consequences of an action that we haven’t even chosen to act out in the present. Tried relating this concept to the fear people have about relationships/commitments and it starts making psychological sense.

Our human brain wiring is fascinating, may be we are all schizophrenics in some way. After all, who can define reality, really? Although the point of this post is to not ponder over what constitutes acceptable reality, it does nullify the need to judge someone’s choices. The fact is, certain people make strange decisions by dodging occurrence of something that has 50% chance of leading to self-blame. As complicated as this statement I’ve crafted sounds, a simple example can help you understand clearly-

People are happy to exchange their pens than lottery tickets. Why? Because the decision to share a pen has no after effects as opposed to exchanging lottery tickets. You could give your lottery ticket away to someone and that person could end up winning the lottery! No one wants that! 

Studies show that Anticipated Regret creates a more powerful emotional experience than the actual regret, had you chosen to follow through and take the action. This article from Business Insider is written along the same lines–Do we work too hard to avoid regret?

Why do we anticipate regret?

The simple answer, from my personal experience is, we anticipate regret to avoid future self blame.

Now, here comes the cookie. Our brains are awesome at rationalizing an actual regret and therefore, it doesn’t hurt quite as bad as the anticipated regret makes us believe. Amount of self blame drops down when the regret is being lived than fantasized.

What I’ve concluded from this brilliant topic is that keeping anticipated regret out of our daily decision making process is a smart way to experience life. From my personal power charged life’s high-low-diagonal emotions, I’ve learnt that it is better to close your eyes and drink the medicine no-matter how bad it tastes! The longer you try to avoid it, the stronger that flu will get at making your body feel like a back alley crack whore.

While we find ourselves sitting in a safe bubble after believing we have dodged the action that could lead to future regret, in that place we are totally unaware of what is lurking around the corner. Ours is not a bug’s life, hence it can be safely concluded that dramatic lessons won’t ever stop popping right and left. Making a decision that might lead to regret but also has an equal chance of working out just fine and probably making your life richer, can’t be that hard! Better to live through a short period of self blame than hire Lionel Messi to kick your behind for the rest of your life because now you regret having anticipated regret!

Two days after his sister Leslie’s death and Nick was back on stage. Scribbling down this blog post to expressive the massive respect I have for this guy. I can’t even begin to imagine the strength of mind one would need to get back to work, only 2 days after suffering a loss like that but kudos to Nick.

Sure he can be judged as whatever fill in the blanks kind of crazy person but somehow I understand where he comes from although I could personally never be that person. Despite having the option to re-schedule these shows, he chose to perform-to work and that in my opinion is the sign of a strong character.

In this video, he dedicates this song “Falling Down” to his little sister. These lyrics touch my heart. We have all heard songs filled with emotions but never before have I witnessed something that comes out of sincere pain/heartache. I almost feel a bizarre guilt for watching this video yet somehow the fans singing along turn that awkwardness into something amazing. May be in this quick use and dispose generation we are in, it takes moments like these for some to realize that at the end of day, we all hurt the same.

Silly childhood crushes are just that–silly and I’ve had plenty…but over the years, Nick has inspired me in many ways. Whether it was to lose weight or put my heart into what I love to do regardless of how people judge me, the older he gets, the more he amazes me. At 27, I can hardly think of this as a crush, I’m 12-13 years past that stage where your teenage idols seem picture perfect. Now he’s just a guy, who continues to inspire my lifestyle in subtle ways and I still live with a dream that someday I get to have 10-15 mins worth of random conversation with this awkwardly incredible individual about UFO’s, art and passion.

Truly hope the best for him-health, happiness and love.

]]> http://rhetoricalcocktail.co.uk/2012/02/04/i-keep-falling-down/feed/ 0 loominator http://rhetoricalcocktail.co.uk/2012/01/30/mobli-com-is-going-to-be-big/ http://rhetoricalcocktail.co.uk/2012/01/30/mobli-com-is-going-to-be-big/#comments Mon, 30 Jan 2012 14:14:48 +0000 loominator http://rhetoricalcocktail.co.uk/?p=712 ]]> …me thinks.

Mobli.com has a Hollywood connection and its not Ashton Kutcher. With Leonardo DiCaprio investing around $4 million, now this Israeli startup has managed to rope in Lance Armstrong on board.

Image from TechCrunch

So, what is Mobli?

“Mobli is a real-time visual media platform made up of subject-based channels such as people, places and topics. Mobli enables users to see the world through other people’s eyes!” -stolen from their website

Mobli is super simple and with quite a few interesting filters, this phone app kicks the backside of other apps.

Note to self and others like me: Mobli is strictly-phone only! D-O-H I say this because I was looking for an upload button on my mac. Not sure why the concept didn’t process well in my head the first time around, but now I get it, Mobli is only for phones, hence real time and all that. Ha! Somedays are indeed spessshul.

What sets it apart as a social network?

I admit, sometimes I get stuck in a technology loop until my ADHD interferes and I can’t take it anymore. Enough with these networks already eh? But Mobli is not another Facebook. You can integrate it with Facebook/Twitter and Gmail, to “watch” your mates channels but other than that, its a unique network by itself. As the creators put it, social networks were made before smart phones took off which meant they weren’t really prepared to handle the smart phone action!

Cool things about Mobli

There are plenty channels to watch, anything that interests you, is probably on there. You can do the usual “liking”, “commenting” on media. But the unique selling point plays on the issue we face quite often- you go to an event like a wedding or may be a convention. You aren’t friends with everyone at that event and sharing photos becomes difficult. Mobli lets people upload videos/photos from events and creates a separate channel based on the location and event you feed into it, there by simplifying the process of sharing media. Further more, if you are planning an event at a particular venue, you can run a search and check out other photos taken by people in the past at that same venue! I think this is pretty cool. Event organisers can definitely play around a lot with this platform.

The ‘Live’ channel lets you follow everything in real time. This will be great for journalists or just ordinary people like me. Suppose there is a massive earthquake or the aliens decide to land somewhere in the US, we’ll know whats going on in real time. Kind of like what Twitter does but loaded with more media and not just panicky tweets (Reminder: London Riots and me being one of the panicked tweeter)

Quite a few American celebs (Paris Hilton, David Arquette) are already on Mobli, it appears to me that the platform has gained popularity in the US. A Google Insights search returns with messed up results as ‘mobli’ looks similar to a common typo for the term ‘mobile’. Pfft. For a second there I was quite amazed that this search term is really taking off in Pakistan and India. Not that there’s a reason it wouldn’t but I’d imagine other countries on top.

I personally love it but it can get addictive real soon. Its not a time waster like Pinterest *using positive tone of voice here*, incase people end up comparing it to the latest Pinterest craze. Mobli actually meets a purpose and right when you were sitting there thinking that the social network market is saturated, along comes a platform that you truly missed. You just never knew it!

Here’s wishing that my mates soon catch up on Mobli but looking at how lonely I still feel on Pinterest or even Facebook on most days, seen as none of my close ones can be bothered with cool technology, my social future on Mobli looks lame!

Here’s an interview with Mobli’s Boaz Hecht,  for anyone who wants to know more about Mobli.

Amongst the million minor d-bag activities carried on by certain Indian men of the creepy kind, like imperial arrogance, women-must-stay-at-home-and-raise-kids attitude, the one that bothers me the most is- Adding random women on social networks!  These are a-holes who somehow equate the act of pressing the “Add” button with an open invitation to virtual fapping.

Only people who are in my Friends’ networks can add me on Facebook, even then I find myself ignoring requests from at-least 1 d-bag a month. Facebook isn’t even a problem, the real problem is Google Plus. Just last week, I spent about 30 minutes blocking these creepsters who had added me to their circle on Plus. For kicks, I googled this issue and turns out, a whole LOT of people are irritated and feel harassed by Indian men online.

Growing up in a country where eve-teasing is the Indian man’s birth right and obsession with sex gets out of control when it starts leaking from the spaces between closed doors, I shouldn’t be taken aback by this level of douchebaggery but this time around, I want to seriously analyse this creep level mentality.

I follow quite a few celebrities on Facebook and have often noticed, everytime the celeb makes a public post, there’s a large number of Indian trolls writing about their twisted porn fantasies especially with white women,  in Indian languages. I don’t mean to say people from other countries aren’t perverted but Indians are disturbingly vocal and they are everywhere! Brilliant living examples of how sick the human mind can become when confidence gets a boost by hiding behind a computer screen.

A little research (even though Wikipedia is down today, protesting SOPA), showed me that the number of Indian male users has risen considerably over the past few years with the advent of Internet in villages. Fair enough, this explains why none of these guys who add you can put a sentence together.

The second issue is-Indians are not as exposed to other cultures when compared with other countries. Over the years, tourism might have gotten a boost but India still gets a very low number of tourists. For these Indian guys, the only times they have seen a foreigner or more specifically a “white” person is in Hollywood movies which are more than likely to be porn. When it comes to me, I’m not even white so I don’t understand this obsession with adding me. I’m leaving this one point hanging up in the air because I have no real answer. May be I am a creep magnet.

The last and most important issue is- Sex!

Traditional Indian school of thought is built with minds who can’t talk about sex or even condoms for that matter! The sad, sad situation that a large number of poor people are dying AIDS related deaths is not alarming enough for Indians to openly speak about it. A stupidly large portion of the Indian population likes to believe that a woman stands in front of the mirror and finds herself magically impregnated. If you talk to someone about it, it does sound like no one is even having sex! Someone needs the CSI team to figure out how India ended up being the country with this ridiculously large population?! Me thinks, it includes a lot of standing in front of the mirror act.

Then at a random teen moment these boys (and mostly boys, rarely girls, ‘cos the girls are busy romanticizing cheesy routines from Bollywood movies where the guy drops rose petals from a 1000 roses at the girl’s feet, for her to glide on) are exposed to the naughty movies! Low and behold, now this dude’s imagination shall take a dump in the toilet and race to cross the borderline of socio-path. Mission accomplished by parents who never wanted to talk to him about sex and hope he’d magically discover it on his ‘arranged marriage wedding night’. Here we have, the birth story of the epic level Indian douche-bag who will keep adding you shamelessly even after you have ignored his first two requests to be added. If a woman says NO, its still a YES…apparently.

Google Insights, further proves my point.

This is world-wide search for the term ‘sex’ in 2004

And, this is the state of world-wide search in 2012.

India appears quite dense in 2004 and got even denser in 2012. Of-course there’s a bunch of other neighboring countries which appear just as curious but I can only speak ruthlessly for the one where I was born.

Conclusion time- You can’t have control over who adds you, especially on Google Plus. You can either block these d-bags or use your “share” smartly but I’d recommend Blocking! Drop the block bomb on these creeps like grenades.

There, I’ve vented all my frustration. The sick advantage of having your own blog.

(Structured in a random order)

1. 9gag.com (Although this one gets a bad rep every now and again, it isn’t entirely made up of people who want to troll. A visit to 9gag brightens up my day and puts me in a rainbowy mood. Sort of like a 4:20 blunt)
2. Boredpanda.com (Bored Panda is filled with visual oddities and no it has nothing to do with boredom or pandas. I’ve found some seriously random stuff on this website, sometimes humorous and at other times images that provoke creativity but the bottom line is pure entertainment.)
3. Thecoolhunter.net (The Cool Hunter is a world design and culture website, dedicated to modern creativity and filled with positivity. This website is a visual treat and each post introduces me to something I had not known/seen before! They also have a cool new music section.)
4. Hyperbole and Half (You’ve got to click on this one to really experience the madness of this project. The writer Allie Brosh, has a fantastic way of taking some serious issues and giving them a ridiculously humorous spin, along with funny graphics. I especially love the post “Adventures in Depression”.)
5. Pinterest.com (It seems everyones jumping on the Pinterest wagon now but if you haven’t already, this website takes ‘stuff to do in down time’ to another level, even more so if you are a woman. Pretty is the only word I can use to describe it.)
6. Lost At E-Minor (Lost at E-Minor is slightly eccentric covering everything pop-culture, photography, design, art and music. This one is great for all the creatives out there. I love it because its uber-cool!)
7.  PrettyMuchAmazing.com (Pretty Much Amazing for finding new music. This website has introduced me to such beautiful talent! )
8. TheMusicNinja.com (Music Ninja is another favorite of mine. Similar to Pretty Much Amazing, this one is also a multi-genre music discovery website with some rockin mixes. Very addictive!)
9. TED.com (Not sure how I never came across this website before 2011. To be honest, I don’t think I even knew what exactly TED does until last year *insert embarrassed expression here*. TED.com is the go to source for ideas that make you want to pause and THINK. Heck, I didn’t know Captcha system is used in Re-Captcha to digitalize books! Ridiculously brilliant idea there.)
10. 27bslash6.com (The writer, David Thorne, is the boss of satire. You can re-read his stuff over and over, the words never cease to crack you up!)
11. Refinery29.com (Refinery 29 is a fashion trend spotter. This website makes me wish I had the brains and balls to rob a bank, never get caught and then go buy all the pretty stuff!)